The Olori of Ife, Her Majesty, Queen Wuraola-Zynab Ogunwusi, spoke what I consider words of absolute wisdom, when she stated her belief that gender equality is hardly achievable in the modern world. While speaking at the Emerging Women Forum on Thursday, June 16, the queen said; I am not a huge fan of gender equality. We can’t be equal, We can’t be men. We have our roles to play. She can’t be more correct and my respect for her has risen 100 fold, hence the proud smile on my face in this picture with her royal highness.
Although feminism in itself is a noble cause, and by definition is “a range of political and social movements and ideologies, that share a common goal: to define, establish, and achieve equal political, economic, personal, and social rights for women, the way many of my Nigerian sisters are going about achieving this is becoming counter productive. Although I agree that men and women have equal rights I absolutely disagree that they are equal. Each gender was beautifully created by God, to serve a purpose and assist the other. However saying they are equal is like saying a cap and a pair of boxers are equal. If you are in doubt, attempt wearing your boxers on your head and your cap on your butt and then brush your teeth with your belt and hold your trousers together with your toothbrush, then perhaps, my point will be better illustrated.
There was a certain young lady I was once courting, I remember trying to pick her her up and carry her, only to be corrected very sternly “don’t you EVER carry me, I’m a feminist!” ah…. Lobatan! After that day, I hastily put an end to both the courting and the carrying.
I used to know a guy called Akin who was quite unhappy with his marriage, because he had a very controlling, argumentative wife. This guy was posted to warri by the oil company He was working for, and his wife, who was well educated decided against settling with her husband in warri, choosing to return to the uk to work with an investment bank. Since he didn’t want to lose his marriage, the guy found himself traveling back and forth, visiting London on a monthly basis. While his wife worked on her career in investment banking, he still paid most of her bills from Nigeria, surviving on noodles and sleeping on a cold bed….. All that changed however when he met pretty Ekaete, who was content with her BSC, wanting her home to be her major investment, indulging Akin in the world of Edika Ikong, Afang, Ekpan ku kwo, piom piom and the likes, tempting him regularly with her 28 inch waist and 44 inch hips; today they have 3 children.
Though some men like feisty, argumentative ‘my way or the high way’ kind of women, I unfortunately don’t fall into that category, as I don’t enjoy relationships where women stand up to me all the time, putting their feet down, it’s something I consider a major turn off.
This is one of the reasons why my work relationship with @kaylahoniwo has been so great, primarily because she always knows how to get what she wants, without being rude, cocky or argumentative, making me constantly tell her how much wife material she is, and how lucky the man that would make her his Olori would be.